Hi Dumb-dumbs,

Yeah it’s me, Louis CK. Wow an email, who even uses email anymore? My kids get mad when I send them emails, isn’t that weird? To be mad about an email? It’s so harmless, but I guess that is silly too, why do I care about email? I dunno it used to feel fresh to send an email and now I am just a creepy old man jacking my dick off in front of my gmail account just to feel the rush of human contact at a safe distance. Anyway I am back. I do comedy again. If anyone even DOES comedy. I wanted to email everyone to let them know I am doing this weird thing again. Comedy is so weird, no one fires you or even makes you face consequences for doing bad things they just let you speak loudly at their customers. It’s really silly to do comedy and people have to just sit there and take it, but that is what I love about it. You just gotta sit there and take it while I keep going. Honestly anyone who goes to a comedy show really has no rights in the civilized world anymore.

Hi! It’s me, Louis. I am back.

But I am back and doing comedy and it’s exciting and weird and hard. I forgot how hard comedy is when you take some time away. It’s like I feel rusty, imagine if people got rusty? I bet my dick would have rusted over a few times just from not being used you know? But i haven’t done it in 10 months (comedy, not cumming, I cummed a lot in the last 10 months. People don’t picture dudes cumming enough, can you picture Osama Bin Laden cumming? Isn’t that super weird? Like he came, that dude came a lot) so it feels a little uncomfortable getting back out there and telling jokes and not talking about anything else at all that maybe happened in the preceding 10 months. I hope you come to see me, though I don’t get why anyone goes to see anyone else? Isn’t it odd to buy tickets to SEE someone? I have so much to talk about, though not this one thing that is totally private and no one really needs to know about, and I want you to be there for it. God that is pretentious huh? You just have to see me act out this jerk off session, though not the one you are thinking about for sure not that one nor will I even reference it. So go to my website to see my tour dates and for sure no other statements regarding anything other than comedy. The world is a garbage fire and I am happy to throw a few more tires on the blaze and let this shit get really out of hand. Thanks everyone for waiting patiently these long, long 10 months when I was gone for literally no real reason, your support and denial have meant the world to me. We are all just people who sometimes disappear for 10 months. I hope it gave you time to watch “I Love You, Daddy,” and understand a little bit about where I am coming (cumming) from.

Love to all of you,

Louis CK

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